Can’t I catch a break???

Stopped at a local donut shop on the way in to work today to pick up some donuts for a meeting. And let me just say now that I’d never been to this place before. So I’m chatting with the donut guy as he’s packing up my dozen, and then I go around the corner to pay and he’s like, “So where’s the baby?” At that point I pretended like I didn’t hear him because I’m so sick of telling people that they DO NOT KNOW ME and HAVE NEVER MET ME BEFORE.

Seriously, I get this ALL THE TIME. The same thing happened to me last week. I had stopped by a bar down in Seattle to check out a new SNB and the girl I was sitting next to insisted that she’d met me before. I studied her face, and really tried to place her, but in the end it was a case of mistaken identity, so I politely told her No, sorry, I get that all the time, I don’t think we’ve met.

What is it with these people? I think curly-haired girls suffer the same plight as African-Americans and Asians (in some vague, non-political way). People all think we look alike. But it’s even more than that in my case. People actually think they’ve MET me. It’s a very weird phenomenon, to have to constantly assure people, “Uh, no, I don’t think we’ve met.” Like, why would I deny that? After a while it makes me feel like I’m hiding something, but really, I just want to be honest with people. Next time I’m half tempted to play along and see how far I can run with it. Maybe I’ll even get some free donuts out of the deal.

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3 Responses to Can’t I catch a break???

  1. mike says:

    it’s funny cuz we know this curly-haired woman that looks totally like you and i’m like holy shit it’s vanessa, but she’s from south africa and has that crazy south african accent and she’s not you

  2. funessa says:

    Last night I was watching “Shear Genius” and one of the hair stylists was wearing a shirt that said “YOU DON’T KNOW ME.”

    I don’t get it, but I want it.

  3. Heather says:

    Maybe you exist as two or three other people at the same time and you just don’t remember them when you’re in your Vanessa persona. You should write the screenplay.

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